Giving up on good: aimlessness

This week has been rough, no the past few weeks have been nothing but painful. A wonderful (yes I say that slightly sarcastically) ripping away process was been going down.

Things that I held true, weren't.
Things that I thought I had figured out, I didn't.
Things that I wanted, God didn't.

The past few weeks have been spent with me, on the floor curled up in a ball. I'm frustrated, hurt, confused, trying to reclaim my life for His purpose. Not letting negative things people say over me, become me. Not letting my mistakes become my identity. Not letting fear run my life. It's not easy, nor fun actually.  With out vision, the people perish (proverbs 29:18). This little verse keeps come back to me. In things I read, heard, conversations with the Hubby, all keeps coming back to having a lack of vision. 

When you don't know where you are going, your bond to walk around aimlessly. I'm giving up. I realize its my fear that's keeping me from having a vision for my life, my family, even my blog.
So what is God's vision, 'cause my vision keeps messing everything up. Honestly I'm not 100% sure. I know what breaks me. I know the thought of this little space of internet being wasted makes me frustrated. People leaving this page, and not feeling better about life, the world, doesn't sit well with me at all. I know what its like to not feel like you have a community around you, and longing for someone that understand, or just to listen.  I know that we are BLESSED to live in such an amazing time where technology can do amazing things. Where I can sit and chat with amazing ladies from all over and leave feeling beyond encouraged. I know that this little place is my voice, a voice that I want to change with world with.

So big things are coming to the blog. The smartest blogger lady friend I know told me

"just because every one else does something one way doesn't mean you have too"

. 

Wanna link up to the weekly giving up on good? Jump over to Naptime Diaries and linkup.