Reasons and Test Results

We got the test results back today from our D&E. It got me thinking about when we miscarried, and all the pain and processing we've done since then. I just wanted to say a few things about being on this side of it.

I feel like so many times with miscarriages people like to tell you one thing: "well, there must have been something wrong with the baby". First, let me tell you first hand that's not comforting, not at all.

There is nothing comforting about someone telling you that something was wrong with your child, it doesn't matter if your child is with you or in heaven its still a gut retching thought. Don't try and come up with reasons that you think some one had a miscarriage. You don't know.

Listen:
We live in a fallen world.
A world that doesn't work the perfect way it was created.
Bad things happen for no reason and you can't change that.
We have to stop trying to find "reasons".

When we try to figure out why things happen, it very easy to miss what God is trying to do through the event or circumstance. If I would look at it like there was something wrong with my child and that's the only reason I lost it, I would forgot about the falleness that we live in. If I forget about the falleness, I think I would miss the beauty of God. Sometimes you need the pitch black darkness to really see how bright the light actually is.

It says in Proverbs.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.

If I had a reason for every bad thing that happened in my life does that really show trust, faith or hope.

How much trust is in knowing the outcome.
How much faith is in being told a reason.
How much hope is in my own knowledge.

For me, I take hope in not knowing everything. I have comfort in the fact that I don't know everything, and can't explain everything. If my faith was based on how I can explain pain, explain a reason, that would be a very small amount of faith.

Not everything happens for a reason, but God can use everything for His reasons.

That is what I'm going to hold tight too. That is why I worship a God that knows more than I do, that controls more than I can control, and loves more than I can fathom.

With that being said, the baby was missing a chromosome. The baby had what is called Turner syndrome, which means it was missing the sex chromosome. By now some of you are thinking "oh there is your reason you miscarried" but the thing is, babies can be born and live with the syndrome. They do have health problems but they can be born & they can live..

See there isn't always a "reason", just comfort from God.